I wonder if my heart will ever heal? I feel as though my heart will always have a tare that I tried to mend, but its like its sewed up incorrectly with jagged edges and thread hanging about, never to look the same again. And yet I feel like there are people on each side of me expecting me to put the pieces back exactly like they were and when I can't they become frustrated and call me weak. Yet, when an egg is cracked people don't say "oh just tape it up, it will be fine" but these same people expect me to just "tape up my heart" and expect me to be "fine"; or better yet they say "just pop a pill" but how is a pill going to mend my broken, torn heart? There is no tape, no pill, or any specific time that will mend this tare in my heart, even though many say "10 months is too long to grieve". Walk 10 minutes in my shoes and see if you still feel the same.
I have decided to March for my son in the March for Dimes walk. You can view my personal page hereSpecial thanks to those of you that have already donated to my walk. You are very special people. God bless.
Please all of you out there that still have your little ones, give them all an extra hug tonight in memory of baby Johnny.