Monday, December 20, 2010

That Dreaded Time Has Arrived

The dreaded week is here. The week that I didn't want to deal with. The week I wanted to pretend didn't exist. But its here, and its real. Week 31. Baby should weigh almost 4 lbs. Odd, Baby Johnny only weighed 2lbs 4oz and at the last ultrasound baby girl weighed 3lbs 6oz already. Its quite obvious my placenta started to fail earlier than week 31, but no one caught it. What if something happens again and no one catches it? Albeit I am seeing a perinatolgist and a regular OB who both seem to be on top of their game, but it doesn't mean they don't make mistakes. What if they miss something? What if they already have? I can NOT handle another of my babies dying, I can't. The anxiety of this week is weighing down so much on my heart I can barely breathe. Oh God please let this week be over.


  1. Still praying and hoping for a positive outcome for you and baby. I am encouraged that she is growing well! I hope that you have a wonderful Christmas and that 2011 holds many wonderful treasures for you and your family! xoxoxo

  2. I came across your blog from the followers list on Mormon Mommy Blog. It sounds like you are going through a rough time and I hope everything goes well and you can feel peace and comfort through it all.

  3. In our thoughts and prayers!